(Poem #1940) Did I Miss Anything Question frequently asked by students after missing a class Nothing. When we realized you weren't here we sat with our hands folded on our desks in silence, for the full two hours Everything. I gave an exam worth 40 per cent of the grade for this term and assigned some reading due today on which I'm about to hand out a quiz worth 50 per cent Nothing. None of the content of this course has value or meaning Take as many days off as you like: any activities we undertake as a class I assure you will not matter either to you or me and are without purpose Everything. A few minutes after we began last time a shaft of light descended and an angel or other heavenly being appeared and revealed to us what each woman or man must do to attain divine wisdom in this life and the hereafter This is the last time the class will meet before we disperse to bring this good news to all people on earth Nothing. When you are not present how could something significant occur? Everything. Contained in this classroom is a microcosm of human existence assembled for you to query and examine and ponder This is not the only place such an opportunity has been gathered but it was one place And you weren't here |
Being a teacher has its rewards, yes, but it has its frustrations too, as so perfectly summed up by this marvellous poem. For sheer, undiluted annoyance, "did I miss anything" has to rank up there with "will this be on the test?", and Wayman surely speaks for every teacher, everywhere, when he replies with this dryly sarcastic, amusing and yet heartfelt monologue. And I love the power of the ending, where the tone changes, the flow of words slowing and sarcasm giving way to deeper emotion, as the narrator has one, final attempt at the possibly hopeless task of explaining just what the student *did* miss... This is not the only place such an opportunity has been gathered but it was one place And you weren't here martin [Links] Wayman's homepage [including biography and writing philosophy]: http://www.library.utoronto.ca/canpoetry/wayman/index.html