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The Way I Am -- Eminem

Guest poem sent in by David Wright
(Poem #1177) The Way I Am
 This song is for anyone
 f--k it.
 Just shut up and listen

 I sit back with this pack
 of Zig Zags and this bag
 of this weed it gives me
 the s--t needed to be
 the most meanest MC
 on this Earth and since birth
 I've been cursed with this curse
 to just curse and just blurt
 this berserk and bizarre s--t that works
 And it sells and it helps in itself
 to relieve all this tension
 dispensin’ these sentences
 Gettin’ this stress
 that's been eatin’ me recently
 off of this chest
 and I rest again peacefully…
 but at least have the decency
 in you to leave me
 alone, when you freaks
 see me out in the streets
 when I'm eatin’ or feedin’
 my daughter to not
 come and speak to me
 I don't know you
 and no, I don't owe you
 a mo-therf--k-ing
 thing, I'm not Mr. N'Sync,
 I'm not what your friends think
 I'm not Mr. Friendly,
 I can be a prick if you tempt me
 my tank is on empty
 No patience is in me
 and if you offend me
 I'm liftin’ you 10 feet
 in the air
 I don't care
 who is there
 and who saw me destroy you
 Go call you a lawyer,
 file you a lawsuit
 I'll smile in the courtroom
 and buy you a wardrobe
 I'm tired of all you...
 I don't mean to be mean
 but that's all I can be
 is just me
 And I am,
 whatever you say I am
 If I wasn't,
 then why would I say I am?
 In the paper,
 the news everyday I am
 Radio won't even play my jam
 Cause I am,
 whatever you say I am
 If I wasn't,
 then why would I say I am?
 In the paper,
 the news everyday I am
 I don't know it's just the way I am

 Sometimes I just feel like my father,
 I hate to be bothered
 with all of this nonsense
 it's constant
 And, "Oh, it's his lyrical content -
 - the song 'Guilty Conscience'
 has gotten such rotten responses"
 And all of this controversy
 circles me and it seems
 like the media immediately
 points a finger at me
 So I point one back at 'em,
 but not the index or pinkie
 or the ring or the thumb,
 it's the one you put up
 when you don't give a f--k,
 when you won't just put up
 with the bulls--t they pull,
 cause they full of s--t too
 When a dude's getting’ bullied
 and shoots up his school
 and they blame it on Marilyn
 and the heroin -
 Where were the parents at?
 And look where it's at
 Middle America,
 now it's a tragedy
 Now it's so sad to see,
 an upper class ci-ty
 havin’ this happenin’
 then attack Eminem
 cause I rap this way
 But I'm glad cause they feed
 me the fuel that I need
 for the fire to burn
 and it's burnin’
 and I have returned.

 I'm so sick and tired
 of bein’ admired
 that I wish that I
 would just die or get fired
 and dropped from my label
 and stop with the fables
 I'm not gonna be able
 to top on "My Name is..."
 And pigeon-holed into some
 pop-py sensation
 to cop me rotation
 at rock'n'roll stations
 And I just do not got the patience
 to deal with these cocky caucasians
 who think I'm some wigger
 who just tries to be black
 cause I talk with an ac-
 cent, and grab on my balls,
 so they always keep askin’
 the same f--kin’ questions
 What school did I go to,
 what hood I grew up in
 The why, the who what when,
 the where, and the how
 'til I'm grabbin’ my hair
 and I'm tearin’ it out
 cause they drivin’ me crazy...
 I can't take it
 I'm racin’, I'm pacin’,
 I stand and I sit
 And I'm thankful for ev-
 ery fan that I get
 But I can't take a sh-t,
 in the bathroom without
 someone standin’ by it
 No I won't sign your autograph
 You can call me an ass---le
 I'm glad ‘cuz I am,
 whatever you say I am
 If I wasn't,
 then why would I say I am?
 In the paper,
 the news everyday I am
 Radio won't even play my jam
 Cause I am,
 whatever you say I am
 If I wasn't,
 then why would I say I am?
 In the paper,
 the news everyday I am
 I don't know it's just the way I am
-- Eminem
I’m one of an increasing number of older music fans who are listening to
Eminem and other rappers – and while I’m not out to proselytize for rap,
I don’t know many poetry people who are interested in his work, or in
other rappers – and least of all those old-school poetry fans who feel
in their heart of hearts that it isn’t really poetry if it doesn’t have
strong metrics or even rhyme.  Little do they know we’re in a
renaissance of rhyme right now, and for millions of Americans, this is
poetry.  And I really think he’s one of the best satirists out there
today, and that the rhyming and rhythmic skills of artists like Eminem,
Jay-Z, Nas and others is right up there with Chaucer.  The audacity,
outrage, pain, absurdity, intelligence, irony and sheer guts of much of
Eminem’s stuff is impressive.  It doesn't translate all that well to the
page, but for readers who'll never go near the music, I think it might
be worthwhile to have some idea what's going on, hence this submission.

     I’m an old fan of Middle English lit, and I couldn’t help but be
struck by the similarity of this stuff to Skeltonics. (I’m not the
first person to draw this connection – see: John Skelton: The Godfather
of Rap http://searchenginez.com/skelton.html)

     Take a look at this excerpt from Colyn Clout and you’ll see right
away what I mean – Skelton was going after Cardinal Wolsey.

 From Colyn Clout (1519)

 W H A T can it avail
 To drive forth a snail,
 Or to make a sale
 Of an herring’s tail;
 To rhyme or to rail,
 To write or to indict,
 Either for delight
 Or else for despite;
 Or books to compile
 Of divers manner style,
 Vice to revile
 And sin to exile;
 To teach or to preach,
 As reason will reach?
 Say this, and say that,
 His head is so fat,
 He wotteth never what
 Nor whereof he speaketh;
 He cryeth and he creaketh,
 He pryeth and he peaketh,
 He chides and he chatters,
 He prates and he patters,
 He clytters and he clatters,
 He meddles and he smatters,
 He glosses and he flatters;
 Or if he speak plain,
 Than he lacketh brain,
 He is but a fool;
 Let him go to school,
 On a three footed stool
 That he may down sit,
 For he lacketh wit;
 And if that he hit
 The nail on the head,
 It standeth in no stead;
 The devil, they say, is dead,
 The devil is dead.
     It may well so be,
 Or else they would se
 Otherwise, and flee
 From worldly vanity,
 And foul covetousness,
 And other wretchedness,
 Fickle falseness,
 Variableness,
 With unstableness.
     And if ye stand in doubt
 Who brought this rhyme about,
 My name is Colyn Cloute.
 I purpose to shake out
 All my conning bag,
 Like a clerkly hag;
 For though my rhyme be ragged,
 Tattered and jagged,
 Rudely rayne beaten,
 Rusty and moth-eaten,
 If ye take well therewith,
 It hath in it some pith.
 For, as far as I can se,
 It is wrong with each degree:
 For the temporality
 Accuseth the spirituality;
 The spiritual again
 Doth grudge and complain
 Upon the temporal men:
 Thus each of other blother
 The t’one against the t’other:
 Alas, they make me shudder!

Lest you think that Skelton has the edge for being politically inclined,
here’s some more Eminem -

 From Squaredance -  (The Eminem Show)

 Let your hair down to the track,
 yeah kick on back  (Boo!)
 The Boogiemonster of rap,
 yeah the man's back
 with a plan to ambush
 this Bush administration
 Mush the Senate's face in,
 push this generation
 of kids to stand and fight
 for the right to say somethin’
 you might not like,
 this white hot light
 that I'm under, no wonder
 I look so sunburnt
 Oh no I won't leave no stone unturned
 Oh no I won't leave, won't go nowhere
 Do-si-do, oh-yo-ho, hello there
 Oh yeah, don't think I won't go there
 Go to Beirut and do a show there.
 Yeah you laugh till your motherf--kin ass gets drafted
 While you're at band camp thinkin’ the crap can't happen
 'Til you f--k around, get an anthrax napkin
 Inside a package wrapped in Saran Wrap wrappin’
 Open the plastic and then you stand back gaspin’
 F--kin assassins, hijackin’ Amtraks, crashin’
 All this terror, America demands action
 Next thing you know, you've got Uncle Sam's ass askin’
 to join the Army or what you'll do for their Navy
 You just a baby, getting’ recruited at eighteen
 You're on a plane now, eatin’ their food and their baked beans
 I'm twenty-eight, they gon’ take you 'fore they take me
 Crazy insane, or insane crazy?
 When I say Hussein, you say Shady
 My views ain't changed,
 still inhumane, wait
 Arraigned two days late,
 the date's today,
 hang me!

And as someone who values our First Amendment freedoms, its hard not to
admire a guy who throws down a lyric like this to an audience a hundred
times larger than that of any pen-and-ink poet I can think of. Sam
Hamill and Amiri Baraka eat your hearts out...

 From White America  (The Eminem Show)

 So to the parents of America
 I am the derringer
 aimed at little Erica
 to attack her character
 The ringleader of this circus of worthless pawns
 Sent to lead the march right up to the steps of Congress and piss on the
 lawns
 of the White House - to burn the flag and replace it with a Parental
 Advisory sticker
 To spit liquor in the faces of this democracy of hypocrisy
 F--k you Ms. Cheney!
 F--k you Tipper Gore!
 F--k you with the free-est of speech
 this Divided States of Embarrassment will allow me to have-
 F--k you!

      -- Eminem
      (from the Marshall Mathers LP)

David Wright

[Martin adds]

As David rightly predicted when he sent this in, I was in two minds
about running it. I admit to not being a fan of rap music (and, in
particular, not a fan of Eminem and his ilk, who seem to me to overdo
the use of expletives for a diminishingly-returned shock value), and was
somewhat worried about the potential offensiveness of the lyrics.

Still, David's commentary was interesting and thought provoking, and I
think what finally tipped the balance was the realisation that I would
have run the Skelton piece for sheer historical value, even though I
didn't care too much for it either.

Also, to be perfectly fair, rap was never intended to be standalone
verse - like many other song genres, it works much better with its
accompanying music, and tends to suffer when printed in isolation. In
particular, there is a certain apparent roughness to the verse rhythms
that in actuality is not so much rough as performance-oriented. Rap may
scan by sheer fiat in places, but it does so very convincingly. And,
more than any other form I've seen, it has raised assonance to the
status of a perfectly acceptable substitute for a true rhyme. The
assonance mixes freely with the rhyme, and the both work - no mean feat.

And finally, as David so rightly pointed out, for those of you who will
never listen to the music, it's nice to have at least a passing idea of
what's out there.

121 comments: ( or Leave a comment )

David McKelvie said...

I'm glad you posted this. I'm not a hip-hop fan as such, but it promotes a
love of words that isn't found in many other places. And surely a love of
words is one of the foundations of poetry? And if it makes even just a
handful of teenagers turn to "proper poetry" {what a godawful phrase!} then
that can only be a good thing. Many modern poets listened to Dylan and Cohen
in their youth. The poets of the future will take a lot from Eminem.

David

Ann Welp said...

Mr. DeMello, I'm surprised at you!

Raj said...

Wow, the Skelton thing was quite new to me. I wonder if it was meant
to be recited the same way as rap...it would sound so perfect that way.

I am kinda-sorta a rap fan, the kind who prefers the rythm more than the
actual content and I like Eminem coz I think he has genuine charisma. BTW,
"Lose Yourself" (from the 8 mile soundtrack) is my personal favorite.

Raj

NGGulley said...

Martin, I have admired you and your colleagues for making the artistry and
beauty of
poetry available for all to enjoy and appreciate, but I am saddened that
you would "dumb down" this beautiful literary genre by giving space on your
website to the writings of Eminem.

Davis Martin said...

At the end of your commentary, you wrote :

"And finally, as David so rightly pointed out, for those of you who will
never listen to the music, it's nice to have at least a passing idea of
what's out there."

Hm...I'm not sure about 'nice'; 'important but frightening' is closer to the
mark for me, I think! You were absolutely right to run it, though, despite
its shock value. It will be interesting to see reaction over the next few
days.
Thanks for the Minstrels,
Martin Davis
(who writes as a 53 year old and therefore more in touch with Dylan and
Cohen than Eminem!)

daniella said...

I just wanted to thank David and you for this one.
I am not the age nor do i live where i would have a chance of hearing
this, or most likely understanding the words when rapped fast.
Reading it i do see the spirit of the time expressed and the wit which
goes with the anger.
As to the indelicate language F--- it!
For once my surprise when getting this minstrel tid bit was very real!
Is there a web site where i could read more rap songs?
daniella

Martin DeMello said...

Think of it as a celebration of diversity :) Seriously, I was
apprehensive about sending this myself, but the response has been mostly
positive, and it's sparked off a fascinating discussion on the
minstrelsd list, and some nice comments on the webpage. Several people
have enjoyed and it, and I thought David's original comments showed a
fine appreciation in every sense of the word. (I admit, I didn't care
for the lyrics all that much either, but I'm not sorry I ran it).

martin

richard hanson said...

couldn't help but think of lou and peter berryman's "chat with your mother"

O the pirates with their fetid galleons, daggers in their skivvies
With infected tattooed fingers on a blunderbuss or two
Signs of scurvy in their eyes and only mermaids on their minds
It's from them I would expect to hear the F-word, not from you.
We sit down to have a chat, it's F-word this and F-word that.
I can't control how you young people talk to one another,
But I don't want to hear you use that F-word with your mother.

And the lumberjacks from Kodiak vacationing in Anchorage
Enchanted with their pine tar soap and caribou shampoo.
With seven weeks of back pay in their aromatic woolens
It's from them I would expect to hear the F-word, not from you.
We sit down to have a chat, it's F-word this and F-word that.
I can't control how you young people talk to one another,
But I don't want to hear you use that F-word with your mother.

There are militant survivalists with Gucci badoleros
Taking tacky khaki walkie talkies to their rendezvous.
Trading all the latest armor-piercing ammo information
It's from them I would expect to hear the F-word, not from you.
We sit down to have a chat, it's F-word this and F-word that.
I can't control how you young people talk to one another,
But I don't want to hear you use that F-word with your mother.

There are jocks who think that God himself is drooling in the bleachers
In a cold November downpour with a belly full of brew.
Whose entire grasp of heaven has a lot to do with football
It's from them I would expect to hear the F-word, not from you.
We sit down to have a chat, it's F-word this and F-word that.
I can't control how you young people talk to one another,
But I don't want to hear you use that F-word with your mother.

There's unsavory musicians with their filthy pinko lyrics
Who destroy the social fabric and enjoy it when they do.
With their groupies and addictions and their poor heartbroken parents
It's from them I would expect to hear the F-word, not from you.
We sit down to have a chat, it's F-word this and F-word that.
I can't control how you young people talk to one another,
But I don't want to hear you use that F-word with your mother.

Tfinnhead said...

Thank you for this.

Matt Chanoff said...

Martin,

I appreciate the eminem lyric here, as much for the debate it occassioned as for the poem itself, which I think works so much better with the music that it's mostly a waste to look at it on the page. The question of more traditional poetry that echoes rap themes -- bragging, word-fights with other poets, foul language, etcetra, put me in mind of the Kalevala, the Finnish national epic. I vaguely recalled a word dual between two of the wizards that might fill the bill, but I couldn't find a copy of the book anywhere. So I wrote to my brother, who speaks Finnish, and he replied as below:

..The passage you recall is "Runo Kolme"

(Poem Three), one of the best-known Kalevala episodes. It's about Young Joukahainen, "the lanky lad
of Lapland," who is so impressed by his own knowledge of ancient songs and spells that he goes off to challenge Old Stern Vainamoinen, the wizard of Kalevala (and model for Gandolf). Driving his sleigh wildly into the wizard's countryside, he crashes by chance into Vainamoinen's own sleigh. There's a lot of cursing and anger and discussion about who should get out of whose way, Vainamoinen contending that the younger should make way for the elder, to which Joukahainen answers:

Vaha on miehen nuoruuesta
Nuoruuesta, vanuuesta
Kumpi on tieoilta parempi
Muistannalta mahtavampi
Sep' on tiella seisokahan
Toinen tielta siirtykahan

which translates very roughly

What's up with this age crap?
Youth, age, who gives a rap?
The one who busts a phatter rhyme
Who's got the smarts
And beats the time
He's the one who gets to go
The other one's a punk-ass ho.

OK, says Vainamoinen,

Sano korvin kuullakseni
Mita sina eninta tieat

or

My ears are waiting
Let's see what you've got

The contest that follows could have come right out of "Eight Mile." Needless to say, Vainamoinen punks Joukahainen out big time. He sings him into the ground, literally, and Joukahainen only gets out by giving his young beautiful sister to the old guy.

Velipoikasi (yourbrotherboy)

Matt Chanoff said...

Martin,

I appreciate the eminem lyric here, as much for the debate it occassioned as for the poem itself, which I think works so much better with the music that it's mostly a waste to look at it on the page. The question of more traditional poetry that echoes rap themes -- bragging, word-fights with other poets, foul language, etcetra, put me in mind of the Kalevala, the Finnish national epic. I vaguely recalled a word dual between two of the wizards that might fill the bill, but I couldn't find a copy of the book anywhere. So I wrote to my brother, who speaks Finnish, and he replied as below:

.The passage you recall is "Runo Kolme"

(Poem Three), one of the best-known Kalevala episodes. It's about Young Joukahainen, "the lanky lad
of Lapland," who is so impressed by his own knowledge of ancient songs and spells that he goes off to challenge Old Stern Vainamoinen, the wizard of Kalevala (and model for Gandolf). Driving his sleigh wildly into the wizard's countryside, he crashes by chance into Vainamoinen's own sleigh. There's a lot of cursing and anger and discussion about who should get out of whose way, Vainamoinen contending that the younger should make way for the elder, to which Joukahainen answers:

Vaha on miehen nuoruuesta
Nuoruuesta, vanuuesta
Kumpi on tieoilta parempi
Muistannalta mahtavampi
Sep' on tiella seisokahan
Toinen tielta siirtykahan

which translates very roughly

What's up with this age crap?
Youth, age, who gives a rap?
The one who busts a phatter rhyme
Who's got the smarts
And beats the time
He's the one who gets to go
The other one's a punk-ass ho.

OK, says Vainamoinen,

Sano korvin kuullakseni
Mita sina eninta tieat

or

My ears are waiting
Let's see what you've got

The contest that follows could have come right out of "Eight Mile." Needless to say, Vainamoinen punks Joukahainen out big time. He sings him into the ground, literally, and Joukahainen only gets out by giving his young beautiful sister to the old guy.

Velipoikasi (yourbrotherboy)

Bryan Parry said...

And, just to show Eminem hasn't lost his political
touch, from his latest album (Encore) the inspired
lyrics that follow. Even non-opponents of the Iraqi
must admire the lucidness and ferocity of Eminem's
rap.

>>>
Let the president answer a higher anarchy
Strap him with an Ak-47, let him go, fight his own war
Let him impress daddy that way
No more blood for oil, we got our own battles to fight
on our own soil
No more psychological warfare, to trick us to thinking
that we ain't loyal
If we don't serve our own country, we're patronizing a
hero
Look in his eyes its all lies
The stars and stripes, they've been swiped, washed out
and wiped
And replaced with his own face, Mosh now or die
If I get sniped tonight you'll know why,
Cause I told you to fight.
<<<

I have spread my dreams under your feet;
Tread softly, because you tread on my dreams.

-- William Butler Yeats

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