Subscribe: by Email | in Reader

Health Fanatic -- John Cooper Clarke

Guest poem submitted by Ian Barnett:
(Poem #1549) Health Fanatic
 Around the block, against the clock:
 tick tock, tick tock, tick tock;
 running out of breath, running out of socks;
 rubber on the road; flippety flop;
 non-skid agility; chop chop,
 no time to hang about!
 Work out, health fanatic, work out.

 The crack of dawn, lifting weights;
 a tell-tale heart reverberates;
 high in polyunsaturates,
 low in polysaturates;
 a Duke of Edinburgh's award awaits.
 It's a man's life;
 he's a health fanatic; so was his wife.

 A one-man war against decay.
 Enjoys himself the hard way;
 allows himself a Mars a day.
 "How old am I? What do I weigh?
 Punch me there! Does it hurt? No way!"
 Running on the spot, don't get too hot;
 he's a health fanatic, that's why not.

 Peanut power; stay ahead,
 running through the traffic jam taking in the lead.
 Hyperactivity keeps him out of bed.
 Deep down he'd like to kick it in the head.
 They'll regret it when they're dead:
 there's more to life than fun;
 he's a health fanatic; he's got to run.

 Beans, greens and tangerines
 and low cholesterol margarines;
 his limbs are loose, his teeth are clean;
 he's a high octane fresh-air fiend.
 You've got to admit he's keen.
 What can you do but be impressed;
 he's a health fanatic. Give it a rest!

 Shadow-boxing; punch the wall;
 One-a-side football;
 "What's the score?" "One all."
 Could have been a copper; too small.
 Could have been a jockey; too tall.
 Knees up, knees up! Head the ball!
 Nervous energy makes him tick;
 he's a health fanatic. He makes you sick!
-- John Cooper Clarke
The poem's by the Mancunian punk poète maudit and has aged very well since
it was penned back in the godforsaken days of Thatcherism. The Dr. Seuss duh
simplicity of some lines set against tripping (as in 'tripping up') metrical
asymmetries (his limbs are loose, his teeth are clean; / he's a high octane
fresh-air fiend. / You've got to admit he's keen.) deliciously evoke
post-modern man stumbling, choking and ultimately croaking through life and
missing the point. This memento mori of our times has me, as I hope it has
you, in stitches! Get it?

Ian.

88 comments: ( or Leave a comment )

kris snow said...

I cannot remember if I already asked for help on this
or not but am trying to find a copy of a poem,
possibly by William Carlos Williams or Wallace
Stevens. At least those are the two names that were
mentioned to me. An elderlly friend is trying to find
this...it is about Grandmothers Last Visit To the
Hospital...she believes that is the title. She can no
longer see well enough to get onto her computer so I
said I would try to find this. Unfortunately I haven't
had any luck. Is there anyone there that might know
what the poem is or where on line I can find her a
copy?

Thank you.

Kris

viagra online said...

I've been reading a lot about this poem and I think John Cooper Clarke is the best in his category, specially if we are talking about metrical sounds and simplicity lines. Thanks for the information on this blog! I find it very interesting and entertaining! 2j3j

Invertir en oro said...

Hello friend, I read your post and it seems very interesting, I wish we were in touch, too,

can visit my site

Inversiones en petroleo said...

Hello. I would like to congratulate you for the post, is very good, also I like a lot of

reading and researching topics related to your post

Sildenafil said...

John cooper is a genius! I wonder if you have more poems of this guy!

custom essay said...

Excellent! Only here I found all the information!
All right.

Ideas de negocios said...

Thanks for taking the time to discuss this, but I am firmly convinced of this and love to learn more about the subject. If possible, acquire knowledge, would you update your blog with more information? It is very helpful to me

Space Matters Real Estates said...

Hello There. I found your blog using msn. This is a really well written article. I’ll be sure to bookmark it and return to read more of your useful information. Thanks for the post. I will definitely return. Plots for sale in Hyderabad
Plots for sale in Banjara Hills
Plots for sale in Jubilee Hills
Plots for sale in Manikonda
Plots for sale in Madhapur
Plots for sale in kondapur
Plots for sale in Gachibowli
Plots for sale in Kukatpally

Belle said...

http://www.the-healthiest.com is the Healthiest site with answers to health questions.

Asad Yousuf said...

weight losers are recommended or encouraged to taking it, speeding up the fat consumption, stopping the body absorbing fat and accelerating the fat breaking up,zi xiu tang Bee Pollen enables users reshape their body in a short term, you will love it soon as this 100% natural slimming products will bring you visible results in just 1-2 weeks.zi xiu tang

Jak down said...

The purpose of the Ion Bracelet is to reduce pain and restore bodily energy. Magnets and have also been reported to energize and improve circulation and oxygenate the blood.magnetic bracelets for men

Jak down said...

Garlic, dill, basil, and parsley also allow you to pull out the flavor of the food without having to rely on sodium to do the job for you. Health and Lifestyle

Asad Yousuf said...

Start following this weight loss diet plan, along with diet tea and cardio exercise and watch yourself come back in shape.

Asad Yousuf said...

Most people assume bedwetting is a problem parents of young children need to deal with. Not many realise that it can also affect some teenagers and young adults, that’s because it’s a hidden problem.medication reminder alarm

Asad Yousuf said...

The benefits to help humans fight back against aging are found in the intestines of young fruit flies. The flies have a gene known as PG-1 that resides in their intestines. Just like this little insect, humans also have the same PG-1 gene – only ours is in the DNA makeup of our bodies. Anti Aging

Jak down said...

The purpose of the Ion Bracelet is to reduce pain and restore bodily energy. Magnets and have also been reported to energize and improve circulation and oxygenate the blood. inhalation device

Jak down said...

A problem with any of these structures can cause pain that radiates out in to the surrounding areas, and can also be felt as referred pain in other parts of the body. Lower back pain can come in spasms, which are extremely painful episodes where the muscle contracts.MSK Chiropractic Health

Asad Yousuf said...

One study published in Nutrition & Metabolism in 2014 was pretty encouraging, though, following 30 obese women who dropped an average of 8.8 pounds in 8 weeks.2 day diet pills

Alam Jan said...

Great post i must say and thanks for the information. Education is definitely a sticky subject. However, is still among the leading topics of our time. I appreciate your post and look forward to more.lida diet pills

Jak down said...

Most people assume bedwetting is a problem parents of young children need to deal with. Not many realise that it can also affect some teenagers and young adults, that’s because it’s a hidden problem.Balance training

Asad Ali Khatri said...

Lose fat fast by supplementing with nutrients that will help your body be a fat burning machine. Best body composition results will come if you strength train, are active on a regular basis, and round out smart eating with key supplementation.where can i buy garcinia cambogia in uk

Clipping Path Service said...

Thank you for your post, I’ve got started reading that will right after couple in thanks

Asad Ali Khatri said...

iherb coupon can give you wealth. Money, Gold, fame can be other sorts of assets. But without a proper health you cannot enjoy or relish the flavor of these materialistic things. Hence, you need to have a sound health. iherb coupon

William Smith said...

your blog is good and nice post. Business Services | Home Cleaning Products | I learn something more challenging on distinct blogs everyday.

Disable people said...

Great post. Its very interesting and enjoyable. Its must be helpful for us. Thanks for sharing your nice post.
disable people
famous disabled people

corporate entertainer said...

Wow, Excellent post. This article is really very interesting and effective. I think its must be helpful for us. Thanks for sharing your informative.
mentalist

Alam jaan said...

Thanks for sharing this interesting blog with us. My pleasure to being here on your blog..I wanna come beck here for new post from your site.find out more

Online GED Diploma said...

I need to mention that I discovered your journal post exceptionally good! I’m really getting browse preparing to across this data that I found terribly attention-grabbing to read.

Visit: Online GED Diploma

Wasis Rakib said...


This article is effective and informative. I found myself wonder to observe this article. This is pretty impressive and here you have pointed out some superb details. Keep working on this.
Toddler scrubs
Personalized Step Stools

GED Diploma said...

Such an informative post,keep it up,Thanks for sharing.

Career Diplomas said...

Very nice I accept as true with your thoughts. Many thanks a great deal I’ve benefited therefore usually I’ll visit your website.

nelaakter24 said...

Need poker go my website.i hope you don't unlike.!


Ana Rica said...


V P Associates Chartered Tax Advisors and Chartered Certified Accountants, represent an authoritative source on most aspects of tax and specialise in the following: Self-Assessment Tax advice, Self Employed Tax Returns, Company and Corporation Tax advice, Capital Gains Tax advice, Buy-To-Let Property Tax advice, Tax Planning and Tax Consultancy Services. With over 25 years of experience in the business of providing expert tax advice, V P Associates Chartered Tax Advisors offer valuable information to clients to help them save money, reduce and mitigate tax. V P Associates, Chartered Tax Advisors & Chartered Certified Accountants, are the first and foremost specialists in taxation matters. Visit their site for a comprehensive list of services: http://vpassociates.com/

Accountants East Grinstead

Asad Ali said...

yoga cloths fitting pants designed for the practice of yoga as well as other physical activities that involve lots of physical movement, bending and stretching.

Andrea Marquez said...

V P Associates Chartered Tax Advisors and Chartered Certified Accountants, represent an authoritative source on most aspects of tax and specialise in the following: Self-Assessment Tax advice, Self Employed Tax Returns, Company and Corporation Tax advice, Capital Gains Tax advice, Buy-To-Let Property Tax advice, Tax Planning and Tax Consultancy Services. With over 25 years of experience in the business of providing expert tax advice, V P Associates Chartered Tax Advisors offer valuable information to clients to help them save money, reduce and mitigate tax. V P Associates, Chartered Tax Advisors & Chartered Certified Accountants, are the first and foremost specialists in taxation matters. Visit their site for a comprehensive list of services: http://vpassociates.com/

East Grinstead Accountants

Abbie Montrose said...

V P Associates Chartered Tax Advisors and Chartered Certified Accountants, represent an authoritative source on most aspects of tax and specialise in the following: Self-Assessment Tax advice, Self Employed Tax Returns, Company and Corporation Tax advice, Capital Gains Tax advice, Buy-To-Let Property Tax advice, Tax Planning and Tax Consultancy Services. With over 25 years of experience in the business of providing expert tax advice, V P Associates Chartered Tax Advisors offer valuable information to clients to help them save money, reduce and mitigate tax. V P Associates, Chartered Tax Advisors & Chartered Certified Accountants, are the first and foremost specialists in taxation matters. Visit their site for a comprehensive list of services: http://vpassociates.com/

East Grinstead Accountants

Alice Goodwin said...

V P Associates Chartered Tax Advisors and Chartered Certified Accountants, represent an authoritative source on most aspects of tax and specialise in the following: Self-Assessment Tax advice, Self Employed Tax Returns, Company and Corporation Tax advice, Capital Gains Tax advice, Buy-To-Let Property Tax advice, Tax Planning and Tax Consultancy Services. With over 25 years of experience in the business of providing expert tax advice, V P Associates Chartered Tax Advisors offer valuable information to clients to help them save money, reduce and mitigate tax. V P Associates, Chartered Tax Advisors & Chartered Certified Accountants, are the first and foremost specialists in taxation matters. Visit their site for a comprehensive list of services: http://vpassociates.com/

East Grinstead Accountants

Amy Reid said...

V P Associates Chartered Tax Advisors and Chartered Certified Accountants, represent an authoritative source on most aspects of tax and specialise in the following: Self-Assessment Tax advice, Self Employed Tax Returns, Company and Corporation Tax advice, Capital Gains Tax advice, Buy-To-Let Property Tax advice, Tax Planning and Tax Consultancy Services. With over 25 years of experience in the business of providing expert tax advice, V P Associates Chartered Tax Advisors offer valuable information to clients to help them save money, reduce and mitigate tax. V P Associates, Chartered Tax Advisors & Chartered Certified Accountants, are the first and foremost specialists in taxation matters. Visit their site for a comprehensive list of services: http://vpassociates.com/

Accountants Crawley

Asad Ali Khatri said...

wow !! This is a beautiful design. More scalable solution to provide better information, key in:
hidradenitis suppurativa treatment

Asad Ali Khatri said...

Every person needs to have a good night’s sleep. Unfortunately, for some individuals, sleep can be very elusive. Although there are several natural sleeping aids on the market, few deliver quality sleep. Because of it, some people are hesitant to take natural sleeping pills or sleep aids.best natural sleep aids over the counter

Rimi said...

Need potong pasir new condo MCC land go our website for know all information.

Asad Ali said...

iherb discount code: Eze764 $10 OFF - Apply your coupon code for any items you want at iherb! Remember free shipment to USA on +$20 and low rate shipping anywhere in the world.
Get your Discount here:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oZV4G2Hwqi4

Asad Ali said...

One dose of your natural product and I was on my way to relief. Unbelievable. Can't tell you how much better I feel all around. Thank you, thank you, thank you.constipation remedies

Asad Ali said...

Excellent article. I was wondering about this so I'm very happy I found your website.how to grow taller

Obat Herbal said...

Seberat apapun beban masalah yang kamu hadapi saat ini, percayalah bahwa semua itu tidak pernah melebihi batas kemampuan kamu.

Asad Ali Khatri said...

our collection of yoga tops will inspire you to work hard at your yoga routines. Next to attitude and frame of mind, what you wear to work out in is a big part of being successful in achieving your goals.yoga tops

Asad Ali Khatri said...

Healing Natural Oils is a reputed maker of natural oils treatments for various health issues, such as skin tags, warts, moles, headaches, arthritis and more.H-Moles Formula

Asad Ali Khatri said...

They’re a great part of any modern day kitchen and are extremely useful when it comes to cooking homemade meals. Cooking becomes rapid and almost effortless with a top budget food processor in your home and they’re especially useful when it comes to creating meals for 2 or more people.bestbudgetfoodprocessor.com/professional-commercial-grade-reviews/

Tobiel Madas said...

Puncak tertinggi di tanah jawa adalah puncak mahameru di gunung semeru dengan ketinggian 3676 meter diatas permukaan laut. Untuk menaklukkan puncak gunung semeru ini dibutuhkan keahlian mendaki gunung karena medan yang dilalui sangat berat dan menantang. Persiapan dan kelengkapan pendakian juga harus disiapkan sejak awal sebelum melakukan pendakian gunung semeru agar di tengah jalan tidak terjadi hal-hal yang tidak diinginkan. Mobil avanza atau mobil xenia merupakan mobil keluarga yang sangat pas dimiliki oleh para keluarga harmonis di Indonesia. Kedua mobil ini di design dengan sangat pas untuk perjalanan jauh atau keperluan lainnya. Jika anda butuh sewa mobil avanza atau xenia di kota malang batu maka anda bisa kunjungi website kami di sewa mobil avanza di malang.

Pioneerseo Seo said...

I used it get rid of the horrible period cramps which bothered me for more than 10 years!period pain

Pioneerseo Seo said...

It is designed to empower men to have a healthy and satisfied sexual relationship, with no perils, claims the manufacturing company.vigrx review

Pioneerseo Seo said...

Excellent article. I was wondering about this so I'm very happy I found your website. Chelation Therapy

juli24 said...

Now no need to worry about your weight loss because we come up here with such an amazing product that you will never find its competitor in the market. We are going to introduce you a Phenq Let us tell you more about this product in given below headings.

harryt1632 said...

“best router table” a woodworking tool that will help route shapes or drill hole in wood.

Asad Ali Khatri said...

We help you compare the most actual quotes from common homeowners ins companies from your state which provide high discounts, up to 40%.HOME owners insurance

Post a Comment