And then there's the *other* set of college stereotypes...
(Poem #1906) Bright College Days
Bright college days, oh, carefree days that fly, To thee we sing with our glasses raised on high. [holds up eyeglasses] Let's drink a toast as each of us recalls Ivy-covered professors in ivy-covered halls. Turn on the spigot, Pour the beer and swig it, And gaudeamus igit-itur. Here's to parties we tossed, To the games that we lost (We shall claim that we won them someday). To the girls, young and sweet, To the spacious back seat Of our roommate's beat up Chevrolet. To the beer and Benzedrine, To the way that the dean Tried so hard to be pals with us all. To excuses we fibbed, To the papers we cribbed From the genius who lived down the hall. To the tables down at Mory's (Wherever that may be), Let us drink a toast to all we love the best. We will sleep through all the lectures, And cheat on the exams, And we'll pass, and be forgotten with the rest. Oh, soon we'll be out amid the cold world's strife. Soon we'll be sliding down the razor blade of life. (Oooh!) (laughter) ... Ready? ... But as we go our sordid separate ways, We shall ne'er forget thee, thou golden college days. Hearts full of youth, Hearts full of truth, Six parts gin to one part vermouth.
Note: The song makes parodic reference to several other songs; see the links for an annotated version A typically fun song from Tom Lehrer, sailing high-spiritedly through the standard list of "party school" cliches, and cocking a snook at several other songs on the way. The short, bouncy lines with their skilfully varied rhymes (not to mention a very catchy tune - listen to it if you get a chance!) at one send up the perky enthusiasm of more traditional college songs, and make this one of those songs that sticks in your head. Other random thoughts - "we'll pass and be forgotten with the rest" is an enviably good pun; I dearly wish I'd thought of it myself. And the dean who "tried so hard to be pals with us all" reminds me, appropriately enough, of another passage from Kipling's "Stalky and Co.": Again, a man who has sincerely devoted himself to gaining the esteem of his charges does not like to hear himself described, even at a distance, as "Popularity Prout" by a dark and scowling Celt with a fluent tongue. [...] Oh, Prout he is a nobleman, a nobleman, a nobleman! Our Heffy is a nobleman¿ He does an awful lot, Because his popularity Oh, pop-u-pop-u-larity¿ His giddy popularity Would suffer did he not! The study door stood ajar; and the song, borne by twenty clear voices, came faint from a form-room. The fags rather liked the tune; the words were Beetle's. martin [Theme] I'll wind up the theme tomorrow (unless someone wants to send in a last-minute contribution, of course) with a somewhat more serious song - feel free to guess which one. [Links] The annotated version of the song, including Lehrer's introductory patter: http://members.aol.com/quentncree/lehrer/college.htm See also http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Whiffenpoofs http://quotations.about.com/cs/poemlyrics/a/Gentlemen_Ranke.htm