Guest poem sent in by Amit Chakrabarti
( Poem #299) Taking My Business Elsewhere If she's not here by now, then I guess she's not coming
If she's not here by now, then I guess she don't care
Oh waiter, I won't waste your time anymore
You've already started to sweep down the floor
And I guess she's not coming, so I'll head for the door
I'll be taking my business elsewhere
It wasn't for me, that spark in her eyes
It wasn't for me, that halo in her hair
When she touched me a lump rose up into my throat
But she must act that way with any old soak
And waiter you don't seem to share in the joke
So I'll be taking my business elsewhere
She called me her fantasy
And boldly she kissed me
I'll never get over the sheer surprise
Of her acting that way
And I'm healing okay
But for the eyes of her...
Oh it's cold in the rain and it's dark and it's sad
And I'll miss her tonight on my lonely back stair
I'm sorry for taking so much of your space
I'll move down the street to some friendlier place
'Cause I guess she's not coming, and you're sick of my face
I'll be taking my business elsewhere
-- Richard Thompson |
1994
----------
With simple words and commonplace imagery Thompson paints
a picture that has doubtless haunted every man with red
blood in his veins. Any man who has actually experienced
something similar (and I do hope nobody on this list has)
will probably empathise instantly with the poor bloke who
is the narrator of this poem.
As a piece of poetry it is, I think, good though certainly
not great. Note how the poem evokes images of events that
happened earlier and that are not narrated here directly.
It is this "implicit imagery" aspect that raises this above
the ordinary. Of course the explicit imagery of the brooding,
possibly solitary, man in the cafe (bar? restaurant?) gets
to me too.
Ladies, I hope this touches you emotionally as well!
This was not written to be a poem. These are lyrics to a
song. Thomas has already pointed out some of the limitations
of popular song lyrics which must be borne in mind while
assessing their merit as poetry[1]. Thus the bridge, which
I've intentionally indented, would be jarring in a poem[2]
but should be forgiven here because of the requirements of
song sturcture.
[1] See poem #287.
[2] If I had to make a poem of it, I'd just delete the bridge.
Following Thomas, I urge you to give the song (whose melody
and slow rhythm are truly haunting) three good listens and
then reread the lyrics; your perception of the words above
*will* be changed. The song can be found on Thompson's album
"Mirror Blue" which is, IMHO, one of the finest rock albums
of the 90s. For more on the album, see [Bio].
[Structure]
Having deleted the bridge, the rest of the lyrics do have
compelling strcture. Apart from the obvious rhymes in lines
3-4-5 of each stanza and the one missing foot that gives the
refrain an air of finality, note that the second lines rhyme
across the stanzas. Thompson's use of the trotty anapestic
tetrameter for a serious subject might be questioned[3] but
he is vindicated by Swinburne's "By the North Sea"[4]. Anyway
on the album, Thompson's unique style of delivery greatly
distorts the meter.
[3] Did you question it? :)
[4] Or so Britannica assures me; I couldn't find a copy online.
[Bio]
Richard Thompson is among the most admired guitarists and songwriters
in folk-rock music, and in the 1980s and '90s, he moved from a fervent
cult following to broader exposure while maintaining critical accolades
for his biting guitar work and sardonic songs. He was a founding member
of Fairport Convention, the most important British folk-rock group to
emerge in the 1960s, and he recorded five albums with them. Quitting
the group in January 1971, he made his debut solo album, "Henry the
Human Fly", before forming a duo with his wife Linda. The Thompsons
released six albums before breaking up personally and professionally.
In 1981, Thompson had made a second solo album of instrumentals,
"Strict Tempo!"; with 1983's "Hand of Kindness", his first charting
album, he relaunched his solo career. A couple of label changes later,
Thompson stuck with Capitol Records, for which he has made "Amnesia",
"Rumor and Sigh", "Mirror Blue", "You? Me? Us?", and "Mock Tudor". A
tribute album, "Beat the Retreat", featuring Thompson's songs performed
by R.E.M., Bob Mould, Bonnie Raitt, Los Lobos, and David Byrne, among
others, offers testimony to the high regard in which Thompson is held.
The above filched shamelessly from AMG's page on Thompson.
The album which contains today's song ("Mirror Blue") is a brilliant
mix of wonderful Celtic acoustic ballads, up-to-date rockers, biting
social commentary and of course today's wistfull, melancholy piece
which is the album's coda. If you're even vaguely interested in folk
rock, buy this album. Now.
[Links]
An excellent Thompson site: http://home.alphalink.com.au/~sfy/RT
- Amit
(a.k.a. Chacko)
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