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Will Consider Situation -- Ogden Nash

Guest poem submitted by Vikram Doctor, as part of his
guest theme "Poems at Work":
(Poem #542) Will Consider Situation
 There here are words of radical advice for a young man looking for a job;
 Young man, be a snob.
 Yes, if you are in search of arguments against starting at the bottom,
 Why I've gottem.
 Let the personnel managers differ;
 It,s obvious that you will get on faster at the top than at the bottom because
there are more people at the bottom than at the top so naturally the competition
at the bottom is stiffer.
 If you need any further proof that my theory works
 Well, nobody can deny that presidents get paid more than vice-presidents and
vice-presidents get paid more than clerks.
 Stop looking at me quizzically;
 I want to add that you will never achieve fortune in a job that makes you
uncomfortable physically.
 When anybody tells you that hard jobs are better for you than soft jobs be sure
to repeat this text to them,
 Postmen tramp around all day through rain and snow just to deliver other
people's in cozy air-conditioned offices checks to them.
 You don't need to interpret tea leaves stuck in a cup
 To understand that people who work sitting down get paid more than people who
work standing up.
 Another thing about having a comfortable job is you not only accommodate more
treasure;
 You get more leisure.
 So that when you find you have worked so comfortably that your waistline is a
menace,
 You correct it with golf or tennis.
 Whereas is in an uncomfortable job like piano-moving or stevedoring you
indulge,
 You have no time to exercise, you just continue to bulge.
 To sum it up, young man, there is every reason to refuse a job that will make
heavy demands on you corporally or manually,
 And the only intelligent way to start your career is to accept a sitting
position paying at least twenty-five thousand dollars annually.
-- Ogden Nash
A poem that's evidently the theme song of management institutes (and I say that
being a somewhat unlikely MBA myself).

Vikram.

[thomas adds]

Inflation has not been kind to Ogden Nash - now, how many poets can you say
_that_ about? - ... apart from that, though, this is a wonderfully typical piece
of Nashery. Not as good as some of his best work, but delightful nonetheless.

thomas.

375 comments: ( or Leave a comment )

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